Looking for trouble is a great opportunity to actually look at the energy or intention, rather than the superficial actions, to get at the truth of the matter.
It’s human nature to be able to spot things other people do, before seeing those same traits in ourselves. What we perceive to be negativity or nosiness might actually be intended as helpfulness. Letting the #2 claim helpfulness when there are other agendas can be a real discrepancy, one that may trigger a negative reaction.
Being clear on one’s intentions can go a long way to avoiding conflict.
Hawaiian words
NÄnÄ Ê»ana: looking
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I really notice this when I’m traveling now. Yesterday, traveling through Houston and then Los Angeles, wether standing in line for food or just overhearing those loud cellphone talkers, the conversations tended to be mostly negative and very “blaming.” Many of them centering around what other people were doing wrong or not doing at all.
And perhaps, in my tired and travel weary state, it was a lot of my #2 that was looking for the trouble in others.
What I can say for sure is that it’s wonderful to be back in Hawaii with Lexi and we’re both looking forward to Rox coming home next week!!
Rox,
I love your show. This is the first time I have commented (if memory serves).
I grapple with these issues myself despite being a fabulous life and business coach. There is a big difference between knowing something to be true and being in the experience of that truth, if you get my drift wood.
One thing I like to do with clients is have them pick apart what works with the same intensity that they pick apart what doesn’t work or the short-comings they see in themselves and others.
And then I become a reactive-ego zombie and start the dance all over again and relearn everything. 🙂
Thanks for the continued expressions of love.
Warmly,
Heather Flanagan
Catalytic Converter
http://www.VisualizePossibilities.com