I’m in favor of compartmentalizing things, especially in relationships. I think it reduces stress and gets things resolved faster than globalizing a problem across an entire person or group.
It’s so tempting (and the #2 seems to love the simplicity of it!) to generalize or globalize an entire situation, person, or relationship based on one or a few things. One little slip, and “Aha! You’re horrible and I never want to see you again!”
But I prefer (and actually think it is the more mature thing to do) to isolate problems and deal with them one at a time. To let the positive aspects of a situation/relationship actually weigh in to help remake the peace or solve the dilemma or inspire a new agreement. My #2 wants to sort people, places and things as either “good” or “bad” – no wiggle room. Of course, that can change from day to day, and it’s very draining being at the end of that wide pendulum.
If the same problem occurs over and over, well that’s a different challenge that may benefit from a different response.
Hawaiian words
Hoʻokaʻawale: isolate
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Glad your back in the water again. I hate being sick!
great topic Rox…I always envied people who could compartmentalize but you’re right, it’s just a choice and it makes life so much easier. Good to see you looking your old self again!
I like the hawaiian term a lot. I like it better actually than the term compartmentalize. I believe that isolation of specific things is a little more fitting, and works better for me personally, than simply grouping things together.
Great episode as usual – glad you two are back out from under the sickness clouds (as I am too).
You have an excellent point, Rox. 😀
Which is more important? The baby… or the bath water? A lot of people go out like that… They toss a relationship to someone because of ONE thing that they don’t like about them, essentially robbing themselves of ALL the things they *do* like about that person.
Yes, that was the only time Clinton got caught with that particular female, but Presidents have been “getting on” ever since someone made up the idea of being The President of the United States! 😀 Why do you think there are so many people running around with the last names… Washington… and… Jefferson……
This isn’t so easy to get over in ‘romantic’ relationships, however, because in most cases, people aren’t “with” other people just because they like them. There’s a set of rules and regulations that have to be followed, or all bets are off. Unfortunately, this creates situations where people strive not to get caught being themselves in order to maintain their relationship to someone.
um… besides….. Now, Hillary has a “get out of jail free” card! 😉